-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i could die from never letting go....

Last night I dreamt about a house situated above a freeway. As I walked past the house I looked beyond it to the freeway down below and thought � no, I can�t do this.

Do what?

And then I noted the sky � a solid wall of pearl gray.

Perfectly gray, I though to myself. Even the one section that seemed more charcoal than pearly blended seamlessly � appearing like gradations in a rainbow.

I�m not sure of the significance of this dream but all throughout day I find myself returning to this image of a solid gray sky.

And I keep thinking about Sept. 11 and its one year anniversary next Wednesday.

Sunday, as I skimmed through the New York Times and various articles on the subject of 9-11, I found myself crying again. Something I thought I was over � done with.

Not so.

I asked GB if he�d thought about the anniversary at all. I told him that although I wasn�t sure what I wanted to do to commemorate it, I knew something had to be done.

He agreed and we talked about it for a while. Should we be by ourselves? Should we be with friends? After all it was our friends who made that day so bearable � going to dinner with Angel Boy and then to Caf� to watch the news on their big screen TV � being around those people who are like family.

I�m not entirely sure what is the right thing. I don�t want to take part of some larger memorial and of course �real life� always interferes with the best of intentions � I have homework and class the next day after all.

But to let it pass without some sort of planned acknowledgement � however quiet, however small � seems very wrong.

Maybe Angel Boy will be back from the Japanese tour by then and we can spend it with him.

Maybe we�ll drive out to the airport and take those pictures of the planes we keep talking about.

Or maybe we�ll just turn off the TV and listen to the quiet for a while.

Am I just making too much of this? What about the rest of you? What will you do? If anything?

2:40 pm - 09.04.02

sounds: $cout N*blett
words:
i am:

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previously on ... - next time on ...

money can't buy happiness but it does buy small pieces of of serenity - 15.07.12 - 4:29 pm

sh)t's about to get real, y'all - 31.05.12 - 9:46 am

why the hell not? - 29.04.12 - 8:38 pm

Hear that lonesome whistle blow... - 02.04.12 - 5:18 pm

a faith in something I can't see - 30.03.12 - 3:33 pm

latest entry

about me

archives

notes

base

contact

random entry

guestbook

other diaries:

moodswing
secret-motel
yourtipsucks
sparkspark
arajane
fuck--that
birdandegg
gizzhead
veganfuckk
ratherbored
astralounge
boombasticat
oh-sweet-pea
but-whatever
gingeryette
ann-frank
dearedwin
soapboxdiner
myra-lee
reddirtgirl
kayemess
colddigits
miralogue
nudeplatypus
mrs-roboto
miserystar
allmadhere
widgetbitch
inarticulate