----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- i will not fall, i will not fall Today on the phone my mom wanted to know how "the novel writing" was going and when I told her, well it's not really going so much because I'm so busy with school and work (and surfing I Can Haz Cheeseburger? and Defamer, of course), well then she wanted to know if I was having trouble with ideas and why didn't I just look at my students and try to imagine lives for them and then write about them? It's not the idea part I told her, it's the commitment to sit down and write when my brain and physical being are overloaded with other things such as living. I've got ideas, what I don't have is time. Or a lot of extra energy. Judging by the awkward silence on the other end of the phone I'm pretty sure she didn't quite get that and is still suspicious of my ability to come up with some ideas. Sigh. Maybe I should just take a harder look at my students and go from there. Also: In Santa Cruz, at the beach on Saturday after an afternoon of reading we realized the tide was quickly invading our turf. And, as we ran, skipping over rocks and dodging the waves, I declared loudly (more to reassure myself than anything else): I will not fall! I will not fall! And then I fell. Face first in an enveloping wave. Cut my toes, cut my knee in two places, sliced into my shin. Soaked my clothes and hair, soaked my book. That's what I get for even daring to utter those words out loud. I really can't even blame K for doubling over with laughter as I struggled to shake the wet sand from my rolled up pants and wipe away the blood with my heavy, sopping towel. Really, I get it. Hysterical. 7:40 pm - 06.05.08
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