| ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- the things that are still OK That last entry was so self-pitying and stupid I should delete it but I am resisting because if there is one thing I've learned with my years of writing in this journal is that it's helpful to document these things because when I eventually look back upon it, I'll see it through a new lens of self-reflection. Things are quickly "opening" up around here but aside from carrying on with the things I still did during the shut-down (grocery shopping), we are mostly avoiding this return to "normal". No in-restaurant dining, no crowded places, etc. Buuuuutttt, my hairstylist is going to offer services at her house. Just one person per day, masks and gloves and all the good stuff except she'll send us home with wet hair and that's fine. I am already booked for Sunday. This is the longest I've gone without a proper haircut and it's shaggy--though I will say I like that my hair feels thicker these days (C. actually commented on it) so I am going to ask her to not take much weight off; just a little dusting of the ends and a major bang fix. It's the little things. And good lord do I need the little things right now. Between the ever-mounting death count and all the other horrible news lately (racist cops, racists white ladies, more death, the threats of death), everything is just so fucking heavy lately. I hesitate to even write about it here because I am in such a fucking place of safety and privilege. Things have to change. Obvious-fucking-ly. Unrelated, we spent our holiday weekend working in our yard and though I truly have a black thumb and am decidedly *not* outdoorsy, it felt nice to get out there with some dirt under my fingernails. We finished each day with a cold drink on our back patio, enjoying the flowering succulents and the peace and quiet, gratefully enjoying all the things that are still OK in the world in the face of everything that is not. 2:27 pm - 27.05.20
sounds: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- previously on ... - next time on ...
see our reflections in the water - 28.06.20 - 1:31 pm in which 2020 Me prepares to bore Future Me - 26.06.20 - 6:35 pm i can't sleep because my bed's on fire - 25.06.20 - 1:46 pm motion sickness - 17.06.20 - 11:32 am long-ago past vs. last year's past - 12.06.20 - 4:12 pm |
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