| ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- don't you know who i think i was? Oh life...why must you be so, well, life-ish? Things have just been so up and down lately and, frankly, I don't know which way my head is screwed on. Among the more major downers: On Monday, my company did newsroom layoffs for the first in its 150 year history. No reporters actually lost their jobs. There were "only" seven newsroom jobs total (in addition to the other position would probably end up feeling like a step backward. In other work news that's probably boring to everyone but me, there is now a chance for me to go out for another job at my company. I position I have wanted since the dawn of time. I've been told I'm the leading candidate. I'm told my editor will scream bloody murder if I don't get it. I've been told that opening it up to the rest of the newsroom is merely formality. I've been told that, why yes, this job DOES mean more money. Of course I've been told things like this before so I'm proceeding very carefully, trying desperately not to marry myself to any expectations. Also - law school? No law school? Who knows, but I'm taking a baby step with an informational meeting later this week - just in time for my brain to awaken form a two-year-slumber and say, oh wait - here's the first line to that novel that you've been kicking around. Also: A fight w GB over how he has to stop using me as an excuse to not figure out his own life. We can't just always tend to my needs - he needs to think about his longterm future before it (as it has before) blows up in his face. Our collective faces. I'll be damned if I'm going to be the reason why you don't think about what's next for you, I said. Sigh.
This weekend, in particular, with two "reunion" shows from bands that pre-date GB and I...well, yes. Good times, old times, sad times, those-were-the-days-times all around. GD played "my song" and it almost made me cry. In a good way. In a not-so-good-way: seeing the Rock God, for example, just tears me up inside. He used to think he was going to be somebody. Now, he only drags himself out for the rarest of shows, sits on the barstool and tries to deflect any and all questions about his life away into a mug of beer. So you didn't become somebody - look around the room, baby - who did? We all have those stories and those dreams that weren't necessarily dashed but simply faded. You can't let it kill you. If you did, I'd already be dead. 9:54 am - 22.06.08
sounds: twittering birds ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- previously on ... - next time on ...
money can't buy happiness but it does buy small pieces of of serenity - 15.07.12 - 4:29 pm sh)t's about to get real, y'all - 31.05.12 - 9:46 am why the hell not? - 29.04.12 - 8:38 pm Hear that lonesome whistle blow... - 02.04.12 - 5:18 pm a faith in something I can't see - 30.03.12 - 3:33 pm |
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