| ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- you take the good, you take the bad... I am really very sorry about that last entry. How whiny. How embarrassing. Which is not to say that I haven�t been in this moderate state of freaked-outness lately�I have�.but to sound like such a self-absorbed bitch about the whole thing? Really, I�m sorry. I would blame it all on the hormones but I know they only accentuate the feelings, they don�t create them. Anyway. I�m feeling better now and (hopefully) seeing things a little more clearly, a little less bitterly. It helps that CN approved my thesis. In fact, she said she �loved it��that was wonderful to hear. And it�s not that I�m looking to invalidate what M. thought � but more so just to prove to myself that this is all subjective. It�s art after all. Afterwards I met with M and that was good too. Really. We had a lengthy discussion about the process of art and novel writing and following one�s instinct. She asked me if what she said last week, in regards to particular scenes of my piece, made me angry. Yes, I said. Did you want to resist it, she asked? Yes. Then resist it, she said. Follow your instincts and don�t worry about me. You�re a good writer, it�s in there. And that was that. Well not really � we kept talking and she told me she thought I was simply making the mistakes any first-time novelist makes and the fact that I�ve only been working on this with the idea that it would be a novel for a few months now, well�.it�s a long process, she said. Novels can take years. And I just felt better about that. And I felt better that she was open to how I felt and didn�t just dismiss it all. I felt better that she acknowledged that taste and style play a big role. So now everything is really good to go. Except for the very stupid fact that I brought my signature pages in on the wrong type of paper. For CN this was no big deal � she said she�d sign my thesis title page on Tuesday when I do my reading. No, the problem is that VDW is going out of town. Today. And won�t be back until 2 days after the thesis is due. He signed the page that I brought in with the idea that I could perhaps copy them on to the correct paper. But he also asked me to e-mail the department chair to let her know and find out if it�s OK. It�s not OK. Right now the dept. administrative assistant is trying to find out if they can approve me turning in my thesis on Dec. 1 instead of Nov. 29 �with the idea that it is complete and all that�s missing is VDW�s signature. I feel stupid for not bringing it in on the 100 percent cotton paper�honestly I wasn�t even thinking about that part of it, I just kept thinking approval and signatures, approval and signature. But, while that part is my fault, it isn�t my fault that VDW�s going to be out of town for 12 days � 2 days past the thesis due date. Because if he wasn�t, I could obviously just bring in the correct paper anytime this coming Monday-Wednesday or next Monday. Honestly, if they say that I can�t turn in my thesis and I�m, thus, screwed? Let me tell you, you will hear my scream from here to the eastern tip of Maine. I will be pissed. I don�t expect the world to revolve around me but I think they need to cut me some slack since VDW is going to be gone. The wrong paper? My fault � but one that�s easily fixed. VDW gone? Fine with me, but don�t let it be the roadblock that puts a halt to the last two-and-half-years of work that I�ve put in. OK, enough about school (although I should get off the computer and put in all those commas that CN marked as needed) � it really is a gorgeous day outside. Frosty cold but bright with pretty red and yellow leaves. And tonight there is dinner with friends and a rock show. And tomorrow there is the copying of the thesis on to the correct paper and then, hopefully, the making of soup and bread. And then, if the stars align nicely for me just one more time, I�ll be done with all of this in just over a week. Yes, I�ll have two more weeks of class�.but that almost feels like an afterthought at this point. So what is next? 1:22 pm - 11.20.04
sounds: quiet, except for the wind ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- previously on ... - next time on ...
money can't buy happiness but it does buy small pieces of of serenity - 15.07.12 - 4:29 pm sh)t's about to get real, y'all - 31.05.12 - 9:46 am why the hell not? - 29.04.12 - 8:38 pm Hear that lonesome whistle blow... - 02.04.12 - 5:18 pm a faith in something I can't see - 30.03.12 - 3:33 pm |
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