| ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- i am not the one who sees Early morning Monday arrives with a gray, misty sky and part of me thinks I should just go back and erase that entry. Why should I share with anyone what an emotional wreck I really am - that I am the type of girl who uses the flirting and overtures to fill the chinks in her esteem. It sounds so utterly shameless. But I am. I am. I am. I am. I am. Last night after I got off the computer I was suddenly so very tired. Not tired in a sleepy way but tired in that I-just-can�t-stand-it-anymore. Couldn't stand anything. It was all I could do to kiss GB goodnight and crawl off to the bedroom with my book. I just needed the solitude. I needed the bed. I was asleep by 11 but then woke up around 3 a.m. and from there on out slept like hell � awake every half-hour it seemed. Lying there in the dark listening to his breath. Taking in every small sound that the house makes when we are not moving. Drifting in and out of sleep in a circular motion until I could no longer distinguish between the two. It was one of those mornings when I should have just said to hell with it and pulled myself out of bed once and for all. But sometimes I like lying in that stillness, it�s so seemingly perfect. So seemingly all mine. Tonight GB and SK are going to see the Fall. I would have liked to have seen them but I opted out, choosing instead the opportunity for a night alone. A little vacation in my house. I don�t get enough of those these days. NP: Leonard Cohen: �By the Rivers Dark� PS. The Adavan googles are up to about 7 or 8 now. 8:58 am - 11.19.01
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money can't buy happiness but it does buy small pieces of of serenity - 15.07.12 - 4:29 pm sh)t's about to get real, y'all - 31.05.12 - 9:46 am why the hell not? - 29.04.12 - 8:38 pm Hear that lonesome whistle blow... - 02.04.12 - 5:18 pm a faith in something I can't see - 30.03.12 - 3:33 pm |
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