i saddled up my pony ride

Busy busy last couple of days.

Busy week overall.

To put it in perspective for you I have accumulated enough overtime in the last week to earn two full days’ worth of comp time. That breaks down to working three evenings on top of my regular schedule – including a 15-hour day on Friday. All that and I finished all my homework and went to class on Thursday.

Although I spent a lot of time studying this weekend I’m trying to also get some rest. I slept about 11 hours Saturday night. I LOVE it when we return to standard time. That extra hour is like a precious little gift. It actually makes me giddy.

Anyway – as a result of all the long hours and hard work – my emotions have been in a bit of a jumble. I feel as if I’m on overdrive. This probably explains why I got giddy when, on Friday, a Rather Famous Person told me (jokingly) to ‘fuck off’ and then called me ‘baby’ and ‘honey’ as he clasped my arm.

I don’t care if he called EVERY girl in the vicinity ‘baby’ and ‘honey’. This Rather Famous Person told ME to fuck off and he laughed and then I laughed and it was like our little secret and the fact that he is incredibly sexy only made it a hundred times better.

Yeah I’m a famous-sexy-person emo-slut like that.

And no, he’s not a Rock Star.

And then last night I dreamt that Beck and I were best friends and he was trying to track down a tour sweatshirt in my size.

Um. Hmmmm.

That’s probably because I can’t stop listening to “Sea Change”.

And then a very cute boy at the coffee shop where I study flirted with me and, sitting there all Sunday slumming in my Sonic Youth t-shirt and hair in pigtails I felt, briefly, like maybe I am this cute girl with a confident smile and not the awkward freak geek girl that I really and truly am.

Maybe. Just maybe.

And Saturday night the spouse and I relaxed in front of a fire watching the World Series and drinking red wine.

I’ve even managed to write more than 3,000 of my new short story. I wrote more than 2,000 words yesterday. And I think maybe it doesn’t totally suck. It DOES need a lot of work: some restructuring, lots of polishing – who knows maybe a completely fucking overhaul – but the point is I’m writing.

The fact that my father was featured in a major section cover story in the New York Times on Thursday (with a photo even) and that both my aunt and grandparents had to call to make sure I didn’t miss it has only served to dampen my mood just a bit.

It’s just a bit disconcerting to pick up the New York Times and flip to the section in question and see your father’s face looking back at you and think: That’s my dad – the one with whom I haven’t spoken in more than three years. Good to see he’s still alive and doing well, I guess.

I think this week will be a bit more mellow. I certainly hope so. Certainly I’m not expecting any more celebrity encounters. Nor any more flirting. Just work and school, work and school.

I have class Halloween night. We might go out to the Club when I get home – but I’m not dressing up as anything.

I never do.

I’m boring like that.



P.S. Still haven't had a cigarette but I'm still craving one.

11:07 am - 10.28.02

sounds: fingers tapping on keyboards
words: morning newspapers
i am: ready for the week ... I think


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