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things you will one day know

Sometimes I wonder what it will take for me realize there is more to life than everything you see here.

More to life than what I am. Or what I do. Or what I look like. Or this or that and everything in between.

As if the passing of LC’s father in October – a swift but painful death from cancer - and my co-worker’s daughter’s death last month (car crash) were not enough to remind me of these things…

Today one of my very esteemed colleagues collapsed in the bathroom. He was 86 years old and had been with this company for 50 years – longer than I have been alive. Indeed he was older than I am now when he started working here.

Not only did he refuse any suggestions of retirement but this man was one of the kindest, most endearing, hardest-working individuals I have ever met.

I don’t know of anyone here who has ever uttered or heard an unkind word about him.

It took eight minutes for the paramedics to arrive. They spent another, very long 15-20 minutes trying to revive him before they carried him away on a stretcher and took him to the hospital.

During that 15-20 minute period of time, we all stood staring at the men’s bathroom, waiting for something. Grim, whispering, crying.

They announced a few minutes ago that this dear, kind man had passed away.

And the only things I can think are: why did I not find more time to talk to this person who always went out of his way to ask how I was doing? And I hope that I can maintain the same spirit and worth ethic and enthusiasm for life that he did – indeed if I die in the bathroom at my place of employment because even though I am 86 and well-deserving of retirement, I would just rather be doing what I do best, well then I will consider that a life well-lived. And finally, there is something I need to be learning – something I need to know that LC’s father and A’s daughter’s deaths only started to suggest to me.

I know that life goes on, but I don’t want it to go on without recognizing the beauty of this one man’s life and all that we can learn from it – as well as what we can learn from his passing.

Bill, you will be missed.

3:08 pm - 12.20.02

sounds:
words:
i am:

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