mysteries of your passing luck

Right now I am eating a birthday cookie. Before that I ate some birthday candy. Later, I may eat some birthday cake. Tomorrow I wil tell you about how I got birthday sick from too much sugar. A week from now I will tell you about the birthday five pounds I gained.

But screw it right? I'm thirty-goddamned-three and if I want to gorge on sweets until I collapse, then I will.

Been a very, very busy weekend - spent Christmas shopping / baking / cooking and visiting with friends and family.

Last night we went to GB's grandma's house for an early Christmas dinner. She's been depressed lately because GB's dad and stepmom moved up to Oregon and even though her other son and daughter-in-law are still here (not to mention all her grandkids and great grandkids) she feels lonely. So Christmas is a big deal to her this year - although she's been going out of her way to act as if she doesn't care about it at all - to act like she hates it all....

Sometimes it's been hard to remain patient with her and all of the drama and tears and so-called steely resolve....but after Friday, GB and I both resolved to try and be a little more giving and understanding because we realize that suddenly someone can be gone and even though you meant to do all those things you said you would (talk to them more, help them out, be a friend, etc), they could be gone in just a second and all of your good intentions will be wiped out for a lifetime.

I really wish I could have said goodbye to Bill..or told him how much I appreciated him or admired him or respected him.

Now I can only think those things and hope that I learn my mistakes - and his enduring presence.

Got my lab results back from the doctor on Saturday. Or rather - my lab mystery puzzle.

The doctor scrawled something on there about me coming back in a week or two to "discuss lab results". She also scribbled something about TSH.

After freaking out for a brief second, I decided it couldn't be anything competely fatal and dire if she was only asking me to come back in a week or two. I imagine that when you are Dying of Cancer they don't make you wait a week or two before they discuss results with you.

So I looked up TSH on Google and learned TSH is some sort of thyroid-related hormone.

So my guess is that my lab results show that I potentially have an underactive thyroid (because I certainly don't have an overactive one) and she will probably want to test me again and if that is the truly the case then I will go on medication and that will be the end of the story.

Thank god for Google - because without this info I'd be going crazy. The doctor's office was, of course, closed this weekend. And when I called this morning they offered to make me an appointment for Jan. 8.

But, I'm sorry, I don't want to wait two weeks to discuss lab results! The receptionist said she'd have the doctor call me back today - but I've heard that before.

If I dont hear back from her today, however, I will call again tomorrow and I'm afraid I won't be brimming with holiday cheer. Because even though I'm armed with my Google diagnosis I don't think I should have to rely on an Internet search engine for my medical updates.

Oh shit, I just found out that Joe Strummer died yesterday - of a heart attack. He was only 50....how horrible.

Have to run - I have a million-and-one things to do today - last-minute Christmas shopping that I need to get done before tonight so that I may celebrate my birthday proper with a good dinner and a good movie (hopefully "Far From Heaven")

8:12 am - 12.23.02

sounds: morning sounds
words: various online news sites
i am: 33 today


previously on ... - next time on ...

money can't buy happiness but it does buy small pieces of of serenity - 15.07.12 - 4:29 pm

sh)t's about to get real, y'all - 31.05.12 - 9:46 am

why the hell not? - 29.04.12 - 8:38 pm

Hear that lonesome whistle blow... - 02.04.12 - 5:18 pm

a faith in something I can't see - 30.03.12 - 3:33 pm

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