| ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- blackbird days nervous. nervous. nervous. about tomorrow. class. speaking. why am i doing this to myself? i hate public speaking.... today as I drove my mother home from the auto body shop she reminded me to be patient with GB and to remember how supportive he's been of me over the last several years - when i moved back from NYC - umemployed and broke. When I hated my old job so much I came home either fuming or crying every day... how he is supportive of me in all of my pursuits... it made me feel kind of small and selfish as if she somehow believes that i do not think of these things on my own...i know that's not what she meant...not at all...it's just my own guilt. my own fear of watching my insides harden into a mean little knot of anger - or worse, apathy. sometimes - no, actually quite often - i wonder how much i would put up with if the other person in the relationship were just like me. this afternoon i remembered that these are the Blackbird Days (or are they these Blackbird Days?). 9:20 pm - 01.31.02
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money can't buy happiness but it does buy small pieces of of serenity - 15.07.12 - 4:29 pm sh)t's about to get real, y'all - 31.05.12 - 9:46 am why the hell not? - 29.04.12 - 8:38 pm Hear that lonesome whistle blow... - 02.04.12 - 5:18 pm a faith in something I can't see - 30.03.12 - 3:33 pm |
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